i DO even

An English friend asked for advice about how to write an American character- Here’s my edited response.

We have one math, Cheers was a tv show and isn’t a greeting, and “how are you?” is actually a question and isn’t a greeting either. America, the USA, The United States, and Merica are all the same thing (not like the nebulous relationship between the UK, England, and Europe). The only people who know grams or meters are scientists or drug dealers, and even they don’t know the conversion rate off the top of their heads. “Queue” is the seventeenth letter of the alphabet and not a line, and U doesn’t go anywhere near colors, flavors, or harbors. The Loo is that museum in France (or the first name of that guy who played The Hulk in the 70’s). “The South” is actually in the southeast. The Southwest is actually the southwest, but California isn’t really part of it and nobody calls it that anyways, unless they’re advertising salsa.

beatonna:

King Baby says No
I’ll be honest here, I don’t know if the proper word is Lay or Lie

Chickens Lay, People Lie#kelseygrammar

beatonna:

King Baby says No

I’ll be honest here, I don’t know if the proper word is Lay or Lie

Chickens Lay, People Lie
#kelseygrammar

I don’t talk much about my personals on here, but here goes. I identify as paterkin. My dadsona is Terry, a divorced 55-year old dad with a gray ponytail and a black leather jacket. He goes by the name “Papa Wheelie” but he doesn’t have a motorcycle (he’s worried his kids would want to ride on it).

khanandkittens:

KITTEN DOESN’T WANT TO BE FED. KITTEN WANTS TO HUNT. 

(My new project is photoshopping kittens into my favorite movies! Message me if you have any awesome movie suggestions.)

archiemcphee:

Hooray! It’s time once again to visit the Duck Fashion Show, where haute couture meets sassy waterfowl models. For the past 30 years Australian farmer Brian Harrington has been dressing up and showing off his Famous Ducks at the Fashionable Ducks Show, held during Sydney’s annual Royal Easter Show. Harrington works with a professional dressmaker who individually styles each duck in an impressively elaborate costume. The outfits range from day and evening wear, in both modern and period styles, to fancy bridal wear. Each year the beautifully dressed-up ducks waddle parade along a duck-sized runway before an enthusiastic crowd that numbers in the hundreds.

Visit Brian Harrington’s website to learn more about his fabulous Famous Ducks.

[via Design Taxi]